Memoir

I wrote this my Junior year of high school in English.


Something I Can't Deny

I meet lots of new people in my life. It's something I enjoy doing. I love my social life. I talk to people at school, I talk to people at work, I talk on my phone, I text on my phone, and the list goes on and on. I talk to people everywhere I go. Along with talking to people comes situations like developing great friendships, or just remaining mere acquaintances. I can tell whether I'm going to connect with someone and develop a friendship or not.
Life isn't always fair. Sometimes I want to be good friends with someone I've just met and it never works out. Sometimes I think I'll never be friends with someone, and within the next couple months, it's as if we've been friends our whole lives.
There are people in my life now that I'm very thankful for. I've developed such great friendships with them that I can't imagine us not being friends. Life just wouldn't be the same without them. With these amazing friendships, I've learned to trust these people. I really don't trust easily, but these people have never given me a reason not to trust them. So I've learned to trust these people wholeheartedly, with everything that I am and with everything that I have in me. But along with this trust comes the belief that these people will never hurt me, or let me down, or make mistakes. If I place someone on a pedestal, it is only a matter of time before he or she is destined to fall. I've learned that these people are the ones in my life who shouldn't ever hurt me. They shouldn't ever treat me wrong or say mean things or make me sad. These people have my trust and they shouldn't let me down. But I cannot deny that the people in life that I trust the most will eventually let me down. These are the people that I thought would never disappoint me. But absolutes won't get me anywhere in situations like these. I'm going to get hurt by these people. I'm going to get upset with them. They're going to make me sad and angry, and they're going to say mean things to me or treat me wrong. I love these people, but just like me, they are only human, and they will make mistakes. I cannot deny this. Yet I also cannot deny that when they knock me down, I will pick myself back up, and I will continue to love them and to live my life with them in it. I will forgive them and I will show them kindness, because they make mistakes just like I do. If I never forgive them, how can I expect them to ever forgive me? Yes, these people will surprise me, sometimes in unpleasant ways, but they put up with me, so shouldn't I also put up with them? These people are my friends, my family, my loves. I wouldn't choose to go a day without them, even if they are upsetting me. The negative days will pass, and the positive days will shine brighter than before. I can't deny that I love these people, till the very end of time.

You May "Call Me Ishmael"

This is something I wrote in English my junior year of high school.



Sleeping Beauty

-You may call me Aurora, Princess Aurora if you please. Or if it so befits you, I suppose you may call me Briar Rose, but Rose for short. At birth I was gifted with blessings of beauty and musical talents. I was raised to be lovable and obedient. Some people say I am naive and gullible, but I shake those notions off just like a tree shakes itself of its leaves during autumn. I have a voice filled with so much beauty that it shall surely break your heart and bring tears to your eyes when you hear my melodious tones leave my throat and flow into the air surrounding us. I sing everywhere I go. It's a part of who I am. I am made of beauty, charm, and romance, yet I'm still a little girl on the inside. I still laugh and dance and play in nature, and sing with the birds when I please. I'd like to say I'm a strong, level-headed girl, but I'm not. I'm carefree and curious, but I don't see anything wrong with that.
-I live with the most adorable little old women that you ever did see! Flora, Fauna, and Merryweather are just the best aunts ever. They're like mother hens to me, always watching out for me and wanting to protect me and keep me safe. I'll admit, sometimes they're a little scatter-brained, but I love them all just the same. Every day we sit around the front room and have tea. They make the best tea in all the surrounding kingdoms, though they'll deny it every time. They bicker with one another time and time again, but they mean well. It's sibling talk, really. They're only happy if I'm happy, and they want the best for me. They have a certain bounce and skip to their walk that makes me smile every time I see them. I couldn't ask for better guardians.
-I have one main dream in this little life of mine. I hold fast to the dream of true love. This is where some people say I'm naive, but so be it if that's what they think. I can't stop their thoughts. I believe I will one day find true love and live happily ever after, no matter what anyone else thinks. I live my life in a fairy tale, so I've heard. I suppose it's probably true.
-I've also heard other things. Rumors of sorts, I suppose. I've heard that on my sixteenth birthday I'll prick my finger on a spinning wheel and fall into a deep sleep, only to be awakened by true love's kiss. It sounds a little morbid, yet almost romantic in a messed up way. I'd never wish it upon myself though. I'd never wish it upon anyone, for that matter. My sixteenth birthday is supposed to be the day I claim my place as Princess Aurora in my father King Stefan's kingdom. I should have a fancy dress and a fancy cake and a ball held in my name. It shall be just wonderful. That is, if it happens.
-I worry sometimes that these rumors might be true, but I'm a carefree little spirit, so I put them behind me and skip through life with a joyous attitude. I suppose I'll find true love one way or another, whether it is love at first sight, or by awakening to his sweet kiss. My dream will come true one day, somehow, some way.


-You could call me Sleeping Beauty or Princess Aurora as well, but I'd prefer Nicole. Although I'm going to go out on a limb and say that we act pretty similar. I'm usually gentle and I'm a girl who likes to be dreamy, just like Sleeping Beauty. Both of us can be naive and very stubborn sometimes as well. Like Princess Aurora, I wear my emotions on my sleeve and sometimes risk putting my heart out there for another person to hold. I don't trust as easily as she does, but when I do find someone I can trust, I pour my complete and whole trust in them. This either opens me up for hurt or opens me up for happiness, or sometimes both. Both Sleeping Beauty and I love our social lives, though hers was mostly talking to animals, which I'll admit I sometimes do also. I stick with humans when it comes to singing, though. I don't believe in love at first sight like Sleeping Beauty, but I do have a strong dream to someday fall madly in love and live happily ever after with my "Prince Charming." Though I don't plan on pricking my finger on a spinning wheel and falling into a comatose sleep in order to do so. I do know that love won't be easy, but I'm willing to overcome hardships, just as Sleeping Beauty was willing to accept and overcome her hardship of falling asleep and being awakened with true love's kiss. After all, true love conquers all, hardships included.

Despondency

-Okay, so as you all know, I write things that just come to my mind from out of the blue, and most of the time they are NOT true stories. This is one of those things. It's realistic, yes, but not for me. I started writing and this is what I ended up with.

Enjoy :)



Tears cascade down my face. They tiptoe down my cheeks, leaving footprints from my eyes to my chin. Then they drip, letting loose of their watery grip on my face. They fall, down and down, until they crash onto the ground. And for one second, I close my eyes and suck in a breath. My world stops spinning; my sobs become quiet and life slows for a moment. But the pause is temporary, just like everything else in this life. Just like you. Just like the way you said you'd always be here for me. I need something to hold on to. I need something that won't let me down. But you're gone. You said you would make it. You said you would pull through. You said you'd be here to catch me when I was falling. But I'm falling now. Where are you? Where are your hands to brush away these tears? Where are your arms to hold me tight and pull me close? Where is the kiss upon my forehead and the soft lullaby you used to whisper before bedtime? Where is your booming laugh that used to bring me out of my room and onto your lap? Where are you? Did you think I'd be okay? Did you think I was old enough to take care of myself? Did you think I didn't need you anymore? This pain is all I feel. These tears consume me. Come back. Don't give up. You said I'd always be your little girl. I believed you. Why did you stop fighting? Where did you lose hope? I had enough strength in my heart for both of us, so what made you quit? Why did you choose to take your last breath?

But what do I know? I'm just a little girl with a grieving heart. I don't understand. I'll get over you. I've heard it all so many times that I've almost started believing it. One of these days will prove to be better than all the rest. One of these days I'll stop being angry and blaming you for leaving me alone in this world. One of these days I'll get up and move on.

But today, this day... I think I'll just spend it missing you, Dad.

Writing is very important to me. It's sort of my "escape," if you want to call it that. It's something I do in my free time when the mood suits me, and it's something I really enjoy a lot.

This is something I wrote back in March.

Grace Within Misery

Gently pull the curtains back

Let the sunshine warm your heart

Let it fall in streaks upon your face

Let it represent a fresh start

Wash the misery from your eyes

Believe that today will bring hope

Believe that your soul will be stronger now

Believe that your mind can cope

Take a walk outside and see this day

Remember what made you smile

Remember things that made you laugh

Remember that joy is worthwhile

Have faith in yourself once again

Don't give up on all your dreams

Don't take for granted your beautiful life

Don't fall apart at the seams

Notice that you are showered with love

By your family and your friends

By the affection of your beautiful God

By the way, His love never ends

Your beauty amazes every eye

Realize you are not alone

Receive this kiss from Heaven's lips

 Venture into the unknown